Check out the Olympia Heights Comic. Purchase it here for Kindle.

5 Tips for Flirting With Nerd Girls

5 Tips for Flirting With Nerd Girls

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

I know that this is not education or book related, but I had to get it out there. Over the past week I’ve seen some great web-celeb ladies receiving rude comments from their male fans. I really don’t get it. Do they think that insulting girls is the way to get their attention? It might get attention, but that attention usually results in a BLOCK!

Lucky for me, about 2 years ago, I received a magic white-gold ring that repels 90% of unwanted romantic attention. Before that time, I had to endure a lot of rude flirtation. Another fortunate thing– if I were a White Wolf Exalted character, I would have a perception of ONE– I rarely noticed. My friends had to fill me in when someone was hitting on me.

I know that there is a myth out there that girls like jerks. Here is the truth: crazy girls like jerks. If you’re looking for a wild fling that will end with a keyed car and a broken arm, chase after those crazy girls. If you want a sane girl who will let you tell her about your Vampire character and paint Warhammer models with you, then you’d best be NICE. Here are some tips for hitting on nerdy girls.

1. On Compliments:

“You have nice eyes” or “You remind me of Katniss Everdeen” is a great way to win some points. Just like normal girls, we also like compliments with tact. Don’t make comments about our breasts on our Facebook posts and expect us to consider dating you. We’re more likely considering a restraining order.

2. On Clashing Fandoms:

Maybe you don’t like this show we’re REALLY into. You can express what you didn’t like about our fandom in a civil way, but do not, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, try to convince us that we are WRONG for liking it. Likewise, if we’re doing something in a game that you perceive to be inefficient or wrong, coach us gently and then drop it. Nothing is more obnoxious than having someone in a card shop try to impress you by telling you that it’s stupid not to use this Cat Warrior because it costs one less to play, when I’m making an Angel deck.

3. On Fandoms In General:

We’re nerds because we LOVE our interests. Be it Doctor Who or Steampunk or Anime, we love it without caring about looking cool. Just like normal people do things together, sharing in our interests is the quickest way to our hearts.

4. On Pick-Up Lines:

The best pick-up line, and the only one that works, is asking the girl out. Period. In most cases, nerdy girls are surrounded by guys (or girls, if that’s your thing) who will never take the leap to ask them out. You’re already one step ahead of the rest if you just take a deep breath and nicely ask her to coffee instead of dropping passive aggressive hints for three years and then complaining when someone else takes her out to dinner.

5. On Conversation:

As I said before, we’re nerds because we have interests and we’re not afraid to love them so much that we’re not cool anymore. Use the power of conversation to show us that you are pleasant and intelligent. Be challenging without being confrontational. You’ll get far more from sitting down and talking to her like a human being than any pickup lines or systems could offer. We’re human beings, too.

A Final Note:

If a girl just isn’t attracted to you, decide if you’re okay with being just friends (or not) and leave it at that. It’s another myth, thanks to 90’s teen romances, that the girl will always fall for her nerdy friend in the end. My husband is my best friend, but that doesn’t mean that all friends are husband-material. If there isn’t an attraction, you can’t force it by being the best friend ever, and if she finds out all of this time you spent being her friend was just to try and be her boyfriend, she’s going to be mad. The truth is, you don’t get with a girl (or guy) because you deserve it. You end up with a person romantically because of a mix of attraction and connection. Please don’t be that friend that is always trying to be something more. It won’t end well.


Related posts:

  • Craig

    That felt good. Here are some more complaints about the girl I’m dating:

    1. I can’t stand the sound of her voice. It’s very loud and has a witchy tone.

    2. She interrupts me constantly. She’s the #1 most-interrupting person I’ve ever met and that alone makes me question my sanity for ever going on a second date. I’m not talking about me going on for too long and she interrupts. I’m talking about there could be two minutes of silence, and I’ll start to say something and she will interrupt me half-way through my first sentence. Then she doesn’t back off, just keeps talking. Or if we both stop and I re-start my statement, she’ll interrupt me again in exactly the same place. It’s totally compulsive on her part.

    3. She can’t cum in bed. She says she has never had an orgasm with a man present. We are in our thirties. This should probably be the #1 thing that makes ME crazy for dating her.

    3a.She has some irksome sexual boundaries that don’t jibe with her outward appearance (sexy outfits, tattoos, stilleto heels) or demeanour (e.g. often strolls out of living room into bedroom and disrobes spontaneously). There are seriously basic, staple sex acts that she completely rules out. I don’t really care what the reasoning is, but her reasoning sounds like bullshit and I think she’s just got control/maturity issues and will never cum in bed with a man until she lets go a bit.

    4. Doesn’t respect emergent rules like “we are taking turns picking songs/videos off Youtube”.5. Thinks she can cook. Can not cook worth a shit! (I can cook)6. Claims to have been/currently be a bartender but cannot make a Margarita without practically destroying my kitchen.7. She’s always spilling shit on my carpet and then acting like I’m a tight-ass for wanting to clean it up before it dries out. 

    8. She talks during movies. Not constantly, but at any point, doesn’t matter what’s happening on screen, she’ll just start telling a long unrelated and boring story.

    9 She laughs constantly at everything she says, to the point of mental illness. Every text starts and stops with “lol”…

    Holy shit, this is going on and on. Obviously I should stop dating this person!

  • Craig

    I’m currently dating a real crazy one. She’s the only person I know who calls the cops on people. I must be insane… even the sex is not that great.